Friday, January 27, 2012

House Rules

After reading Kim’s House Rules I became inspired to right some of my own, I believe these will fit perfectly on my fridge… Enjoy!
1.       NO screaming
2.      NO hitting, pushing, kicking, pulling hair, or jumping on anyone’s head
3.      NO spitting
4.      NO throwing objects at other people
5.      NO throwing objects period
6.      NO back-talking
7.      If you get it out… put it back
8.      NO yelling, fighting or asking a million questions before mommy has her coffee
9.      After yelling for mom, wait for a response DO NOT keep yelling mom over and over and over
10.   “NO” means “NO”
11.    If you are told to “wait”, for the love of God please “WAIT”
12.   Asking for something over and over and over again will get you nowhere
13.   DO NOT drop things repeatedly and fake cry for someone to pick them up
14.   DO NOT fake cry for any reason
15.   Share and be nice
16.   Wait your turn
17.   DO NOT jerk things from other people’s hands
18.   Be patient
19.   Teeth-brushing only happens three times a day, secretly brushing your teeth while claiming to “go potty” is not allowed, I know what you’re doing
20.  NO locking doors, especially when mommy is on the other side
21.   NO slamming doors, especially in other peoples’ faces or fingers
22.  DO NOT go potty unless you are SITTING on the potty
23.  Quiet time does not mean it is time to play
24.  NO jumping on the couch
25.  NO jumping on the bed
26.  DO NOT remove all bedding so you can jump on the bed
27.  If you fall off of any object you are not supposed to be on you will get no sympathy
28.  One boo-boo does not require 15 bandaids
29.  When asked to “please stop” just stop
30.  DO NOT touch or put stickers on the TV
31.   DO NOT put stickers on the walls
32.  DO NOT color on the walls
33.  When mommy is on the phone it does not mean it is time for you to do EVERYTHING you are not allowed to do otherwise
34.  If a room is cleaned, keep it clean
35.  After mommy cleans the table DO NOT put your sticky hands on it, you are not helping
36.  Food stays on the table, DO NOT throw it on the floor just because it is “yucky”
37.  DO NOT feed your food to the dogs and then claim they “stole it off your plate”
38.  If you do not eat your dinner DO NOT complain about being hungry at bedtime, tough luck wait for breakfast
39.  Asking to go potty 50 times during bedtime will not keep you from having to go to bed
40. If you wake up in the middle of the night DO NOT use this opportunity to explore and destroy
41.   Saying sorry right after you do something wrong does not mean you will not be punished
42.  If you do not follow these rules then do not be surprised when you are put in time-out


  1. I need these rules.

    1. Tell me about it, since I posted this the girls have broken at least 10 of these rules :(

  2. All apply at my house ESPECIALLY number 40. It is ridiculous what happens between the hours of 1 and 5 in the morning at my house. I would say that she must be sleep walking except she remembers it all.

    1. My only issue is I have one baby gate and two children. Not that it really matters since they have super-human strength that allows them to push their head through the bottom of it and pop it open (I haven't figured it out yet since I wrestle with the damn thing like all the time just to get it off the door)

  3. WOW! That is a long list!!

    Hi! Stopping by from MBC. Great blog!
    Have a nice day!